Recently in Time Wasters Category
Guns are prohibited.
Sorry, they really are prohibited.
Forwarded via email.
Orchard Road flooded.
A soldier came to a fork in the road and saw a lady standing there. Out of breath, he asked, "Please!!!! May I hide under your skirt for a few minutes? I'll explain why later."
The lady agreed.
A moment later, two Military Police came running along and asked, "Miss, have you seen a soldier running by here?"
The lady replied, "He went that way."
After the MPs disappeared, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, "I can't thank you enough, but you see, I didn't want to go to ATEC ."
The lady said, "I think I can fully understand your fear."
The soldier added suggestively, "I hope you don't think that I am rude or impertinent, but you have a great pair of legs!"
The lady replied with a shy and sexy grin, "If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls too ... I didn't want to go to ATEC either."
Source: 40 Stripes.
Forwarded via email.
The email lists ten reasons to throw out the microwave oven. I don't know how true the claims are, but they might be worth your consideration.
- Continually eating food processed from a microwave oven causes long term permanent brain damage by shorting out electrical impulses in the brain (de-polarizing or de-magnetizing the brain tissue).
- The human body cannot metabolize the unknown by-products created in microwaved food.
- Male and female hormone production is shut down and/or altered by continually eating microwaved foods.
- The effects of microwaved food by-products are residual (long term and permanent) within the human body.
- Minerals, vitamins, and nutrients of all microwaved food is reduced or altered so that the human body gets little or no benefit, or the human body absorbs altered compounds that cannot be broken down.
- The minerals in vegetables are altered into cancerous free radicals when cooked in microwave ovens.
- Microwaved foods cause stomach and intestinal cancerous growths (tumors). This may explain the rapidly increased rate of colon cancer in America.
- The prolonged eating of microwaved foods causes cancerous cells to increase in human blood.
- Continual ingestion of microwaved food causes immune system deficiencies through lymph gland and blood serum alterations.
- Eating microwaved food causes loss of memory, concentration, emotional instability, and a decrease of intelligence.
Microwaved Water And The Effects On Plants
Day one.
Day three.
Day five.
Day seven.
Day nine.
Don't move or I'll gain weight.
Source: Digg
Christianity In America.
Source: All That's Interesting.
Missile balloons.
Source: Digg.
It is a slow day in the small Minnesota town of Marshall, and streets are deserted. Times are tough, everybody is in debt, and everybody is living on credit.
A rich tourist visiting the area drives through town, stops at the motel, and lays a $100 bill on the desk saying he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs to pick one for the night.
As soon as he walks upstairs, the motel owner grabs the bill and runs next door to pay his debt to the butcher.
The butcher takes the $100 and runs down the street to retire his debt to the pig farmer.
The pig farmer takes the $100 and heads off to pay his bill to his supplier, the Farmer's Co-op.
The guy at the Farmer's Co-op takes the $100 and runs to pay his debt to the local prostitute, who has also been facing hard times and has had to offer her "services" on credit.
The hooker rushes to the hotel and pays off her room bill with the hotel owner.
The hotel proprietor then places the $100 back on the counter so the rich traveler will not suspect anything.
At that moment the traveler comes down the stairs, states that the rooms are not satisfactory, picks up the $100 bill and leaves town.
No one produced anything. No one earned anything... However, the whole town is now out of debt and now looks to the future with a lot more optimism.
Source : 40 Stripes.
Gameplay.
Upgrade your virus, buy heroes, dominate the world.
Singapore included.
My score.
Infectionator World Dominator : http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/527013
WARNING : GRAPHIC CONTENT
Forwarded via email.
Dried dogs.
This is unbelievably cruel.
Pandemic 2.
Now its up to you to evolve your disease, infect mankind and kill them all!
My strategy to complete the game :
1) Start with parasite class.
2) Start in Madagasca (might require repeated attempts).
3) Sell all symptoms.
4) Set game to fastest speed.
5) Wait till you have accumulated 60-70 evolution points.
6) Buy transmission : Rodent.
7) Buy all resistances in a horizontal manner.
8) Wait for a ship to leave Madagasca and start infecting the world rapidly.
9) Once the world has been infected, buy transmission : Insects.
10) Buy symptoms : Vomiting.
11) Once the world has turned red, buy symptoms : Sores, Fever and Fatigue.
12) Buy all other lethal symptoms and watch the world end.
Tried this three times and it works!
Pandemic 2 : http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/448950
Sofa dangling out of an open car boot.
While going up a slope, everybody maintained their distance from the car because they were worried that the sofa might slide out.
Toss The Turtle.
Perfect for a boring day at the office.
Toss The Turtle : http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/508440
Jeep Stuck At Spottiswoode Park Road.
We spotted this jeep stuck on a grass slope at Spottiswoode Park Road this morning.
When we returned home at night, the jeep was still there.
Either the salesman was really convincing or the driver was too naive.
McDonalds In Pakistan.
[ Update : 230609 ]
Craftsman said:
You haven't seen Zouk in Pakistan! :D http://paul-chan.net/?p=124
The cruel process of making snakeskin products.
How snakeskin products are made.
One Star Hangover
No pain. No real feeling of illness. You're able to function relatively well. However, you are still parched. You can drink 5 sodas and still feel this way. For some reason, you are craving a steak & fries.
Two Star Hangover
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay, but you have the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you are chugging is only increasing your rumbling gut, which is still tossing around the fruity pancake from the 3:00 AM Waffle House excursion. There is some definite havoc being wreaked upon your bowels.
Three Star Hangover
Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely not productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the flavored schnapps shots your alcoholic friends dared you to drink.Life would be better right now if you were home in your bed watching Lucy reruns. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 iced teas and a diet Coke -- yet you haven't peed once.
Four Star Hangover
Life sucks. Your head is throbbing. You can't speak too quickly or else you might puke. Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze. You wore nice clothes, but that can't hide the fact that you only shaved one side of your face.(For the ladies, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars.) Your eyes look like one big red vein, and even your hair hurts. Your sphincter is in perpetual spasm, and the first of about five shits you take during the day brings water to the eyes of everyone who enters the bathroom.
Five Star Hangover
You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying the employee who sits in the next cube. Vodka vapor is seeping out of every pore and making you dizzy. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth from brushing your teeth in an attempt to get the remnants of the poop fairy out. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva so your tongue is suffocating you. You don't have the foggiest idea who the hell the stranger was passed out in your bed this morning. Any attempt to defecate results in a fire hose like discharge of alcohol-scented fluid with a rare floater thrown in. The sole purpose of this floater seems to be to splash the toilet water all over your ass. Death sounds pretty good about right now.
Source : Doug's Divine Drollery.
Birds are just like suicide bombers.
Bird strikes.
Forwarded via email.
They look like lions!
Tibet dogs.
Aftermath of Santika nightclub fire in Bangkok, Thailand. Forwarded via email.
Santika Nightclub aftermath.
Forwarded via email :
Fish skin is made from PE(plastic) tube,meat is made of some kind of jelly or gelatin. It has fishy smell. Boiled with hot water for sometime and the PE bursts, exposing fish meat. This fish has no bone and the color would not change after cooking a long time. These fish are also sold in flour-coated form.
Made In China Ikan Bilis.
Finger art.
Sushi art.
Forwarded email from Dad. I'm not sure how true this is.
The first 3 digits of barcode 690, 691, 692 is made in CHINA.
471 is Made in Taiwan.
Barcodes and country names
00-09 USA & Canada
30-37 France
43-44 Germany
59 Japan
50 UK
76 Swiss
471 Taiwan
690-692 China
888 Singapore
After 6 beers
After 2 glasses of wine
After 2 bottles of wine - shared of course
After too many margaritas
After 3 Kamikazes
After 7 rum & cokes
After 1 large purple haze
After 3 martinis
After 1 bottle of tequila
The NEW Daylight Robbery
Courtesy of Mark Wong.
Jessie forwarded me an interesting email today. Is this really possible?
Suddenly the shoreline north of Sydney was transformed into the Cappuccino Coast. Foam swallowed an entire beach and half the nearby buildings, including the local lifeguards' centre,in a freak display of nature at Yamba in New South Wales. One minute a group of teenage surfers were waiting to catch a wave, the next they were swallowed up in a giant bubble bath. The foam was so light that they could puff it out of their hands and watch it float away.
Tom Woods, 12, emerges from the clouds of foam after deciding that surfing was not an option.
It stretched for 30 miles out into the Pacific in a phenomenon not seen at the beach for more than three decades. Scientists explain that the foam is created by impurities in the ocean, such as salts, chemicals, dead plants, decomposed fish and excretions from seaweed. All are churned up together by powerful currents which cause the water to form bubbles. These bubbles stick to each other as they are carried below the surface by the current towards the shore. As a wave starts to form on the surface, the motion of the water causes the bubbles to swirl upwards and, massed together, they become foam. The foam "surfs" towards shore until the wave "crashes", tossing the foam into the air.
The foam was so thick it came all the way up to the surf club. "It's the same effect you get when you whip up a milk shake in a blender," explained a marine expert. "The more powerful the swirl, the more foam you create on the surface and the lighter it becomes." In this case, storms off the New South Wales Coast and further north off Queensland had created a huge disturbance in the ocean, hitting a stretch of water where there was a particularly high amount of the substances which form into bubbles. As for 12-year-old beachgoer Tom Woods, who has been surfing since he was two, riding a wave was out of the question. "Me and my mates just spent the afternoon leaping about in that stuff," he said. "It was quite cool to touch and it was really weird. It was like clouds of air - you could hardly feel it."
Children play among all the foam which was been whipped up by cyclonic conditions.
Bill owns a company that manufactures and installs car wash systems. Bill's company installed a car wash system in Frederick, Md. Now, understand that these are complete systems, including the money changer and money taking machines.
The problem started when the new owner complained to Bill that he was losing significant amounts of money from his coin machines each week.
He went as far as to accuse Bill's employees of having a key to the boxes and ripping him off. Bill just couldn't believe that his people would do that, so they setup a camera to catch the thief in action. Well, they did catch him on film!
That's a bird sitting on the change slot of the machine.
The bird had to go down into the machine, and back up inside to get to the money!
That's three quarters he has in his beak! Another amazing thing is that it was not just one bird -- there were several working together. Once they identified the thieves, they found over $4000 in quarters on the roof of the car wash and more under a nearby tree.
Dad went back to Penang for a couple of days. Here's what he calls, The Best Chef In Penang.
Dad forwarded me this email. Now that petrol prices are getting very unpredictable, I hope these tips will help you get the best value for your gas.
Someone who has been in petroleum pipeline business for about 31 years and is currently working for the Kinder-Morgan Pipeline in San Jose, CA wrote the following information:
We deliver about 4 million gallons in a 24-hour period from the pipe line; one day it's diesel, the next day it's jet fuel and gasoline. We have 34 storage tanks here with a total capacity of 16,800,000 gallons. Here are some tricks to help you get your money's worth.
1. Fill up your car or truck in the morning when the temperature is still cool. Remember that all service stations have their storage tanks buried below ground; and the colder the ground, the denser the gasoline. When it gets warmer gasoline expands, so if you're filling up in the afternoon or in the evening, what should be a gallon is not exactly a gallon. In the petroleum business, the specific gravity and temperature of the fuel (gasoline, diesel, jet fuel, ethanol and other petroleum products) are significant. Every truckload that we load is temperature-compensated so that the indicated gallonage is actually the amount pumped. A one-degree rise in temperature is a big deal for businesses, but service stations don't have temperature compensation at their pumps.
2. If a tanker truck is filling the station's tank at the time you want to buy gas, do not fill up; most likely dirt and sludge in the tank is being stirred up when gas is being delivered, and you might be transferring that dirt from the bottom of their tank into your car's tank.
3. Fill up when your gas tank is half-full (or half-empty), because the more gas you have in your tank the less air there is and gasoline evaporates rapidly, especially when it's warm. (Gasoline storage tanks have an internal floating 'roof' membrane to act as a barrier between the gas and the atmosphere, thereby minimizing evaporation.)
4. If you look at the trigger you'll see that it has three delivery settings: slow, medium and high. When you're filling up do not squeeze the trigger of the nozzle to the high setting. You should be pumping at the slow setting, thereby minimizing vapors created while you are pumping. Hoses at the pump are corrugated; the corrugations act as a return path for vapor recovery from gas that already has been metered. If you are pumping at the high setting, the agitated gasoline contains more vapor, which is being sucked back into the underground tank, so you're getting less gas for your money.
So far I've only tried tip no. 4. It'll give you tremendous satisfaction (probably all in the mind) just standing there waiting and waiting for the tank to fill up.
Jessie sent me a photo of Butterfly Man...
Fantastic pet to own!
Fantastic comic strip from Kontraband.com ! Had me laughing like crazy.
Left, bad cop. Right, good cop. Middle... fat cop.
Dad sent me a forwarded email regarding the Traffic Police's latest speed trap. The Dustbin Speed Trap. Virtually undetectable. Fake or not, decide for yourself.
I think I'll just stop by the side and shove the entire dustbin into my car. The camera alone is already worth a lot of money.
[Update : 290507]
Timothy has something interesting :
Hey Chris, the camera is real but don't think they use it here in SG. Look at the 3rd pic, the car and road doesn't look local. :)
DHL - 1 , Vios - 0
Nasi Briyani... anyone?
And they don't drink goat's milk. They drink Pepsi (see if you can spot it).
Shanghai's Traffic Police latest toy.
My girl just forwarded me an email with lots of weird inventions (I really don't know where she gets them). If you want the whole thing, just leave your email address in the comments box, be nice and she'll forward it to you while she's at work :D
My favourites ...
Ok, I'm straight. :D
The power of Photoshop.
F400 Mercedes Carving Concept Car.
Wow. Absolutely slick!
Thanks dad for the pictures :D
The Korean Transexuals
The China Transexuals
